The song “Let Her Go” by Passenger has really hit home for me recently.

“You only need the light when it’s burring low.

Only miss the sun when it starts to snow.

Only know you love her when you let her go.

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low.

Only hate the road when you’re missing home.”

I love that this song blatantly exposes comparisons that people make everyday. I think it is easy for us to forget that people, themselves, and situations should be taken separately, and judged in their own context. Because I am me, you are you, and today is today.

We live life in a constant state of comparisons, forever equating ourselves to others in order to evaluate our self-worth. This needs to end.

It is not an easy thing to evaluate yourself or a situation in solely in itself because of how strongly society roots self-worth, and situational-worth in associations. We must let go of these comparisons, because the only fair way to evaluate yourself is in terms of yourself.

When I compare myself to the girl next to me in class I wonder why my hair can’t be as shiny as hers, why she is a better athlete than me, and why she scored one point higher on the test than I did. The problem with this is that we are each our own person, and it is unfair to compete with or compare ourselves to anyone beside ourselves. This kind of thinking bring us down, creating an unnecessary lower sense of self and self-worth. Do you understand the negativity that is associated with this kind of perception?

When I look at myself in isolation of others I see a motivated person, someone who is stronger than she was yesterday, who can run a mile further than last month, and someone who has come a very long way from who she was a few years ago. This is the kind of comparison that should be used, the kind that gives us strength, hope and determination. I am not perfect, and by no means am I always able to do this. However, I encourage you to try this with me, let us take this journey together.

You are not beautiful because you look better than the girl next to you. You are beautiful because you are beautiful. Self-hate and self-defeating tendencies root in unrealistic and unnecessary comparisons to other people.  In order to find peace, we must reject these comparisons, and look solely inward at ourselves.



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